Rewarding Techniques: Dos and Don’ts

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We all know children need rewards as a kind of positive reinforcement. However, not many are aware of how to reward children in the right way

What is the wrong rewarding?

The wrong rewarding is also known as the negative reinforcement. For example, when your kids do not clean their room, instead of encouraging them to do it, you say that they may have a new toy as a reward after cleaning their room. The children’ s response or behavior is strengthened by removing their negative outcome or their unfavorable feelings. Also, your children will learn that when they act, they can gain attention from you or acquire what they want. Over the time, over–negotiating can reinforce their misbehavior and cause you to lose control over your children.

How about the right rewarding?

The right rewarding is when you give some compensation for their good behavior. This seems to be effective because your children will learn that they have to do some things deserving if they want rewards and recognition. It will be better than being manipulated and extorted. But, let your children know that they have to do that with ethical and moral means, not with cheating.

What are rewarding types?

There are three different rewarding techniques that you can use with your children:

Continuous rewarding. This method offers your children rewards every time they do the good behavior. However, kids will stop their good behavior when you stop giving rewards.
Intermittent rewarding. In this situation, your kids have received rewards at regular intervals of time. This can take time for children to learn behaviors, but when you stop to give rewards, their behavior still remains.
Random rewarding. This is seen as the preferred technique. The rewards will be given at random intervals. In this case, your children will learn how to behave for a long time and try to turn it into a desired behavior. When it becomes a habit, it cannot easily disappear.

Experts believe that you should start with continuous rewarding to help your children improve fast, then move on to intermittent rewarding and finally settle with random rewarding. That way, your children’s behaviors become habits that can follow them even into their adulthood. At first, you may be tempted to just give your children what they want so they will stop pestering you. However, it’s important to be tough and consistent with your rewarding method since it will be more beneficial in the long run.


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Hello Health Group does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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