How to manage emotions when lung cancer comes back

Despite your efforts to treat lung cancer, there is a chance that lung cancer comes back. This is called recurrence of cancer. You and your child may go through the same treatment again, but this time, there are different feelings that you might experience.

Understanding recurrence cancer

The first question family members and patients with lung cancer have is “How can this happen again?” There are two reasons why lung cancer might come back:

Recurrence doesn’t necessary occur in the lung. It might affect the lymph nodes and distant sites such as the bone, brain or the liver.

Your child might have the same symptoms and treatment as the first cancer, depending on the location of the recurrence.

Managing your emotions when recurrence cancer happens

Recurrence cancer is more difficult to cope with than the first time your child got lung cancer. You may experience all sorts of emotions, including anger, distress, guilt and even blame. The American Cancer Society acknowledges that it may be natural to blame your child’s doctor for letting this happen again. You may blame your child’s doctor for not following up your child properly, or you may even blame yourself for not listening to what the doctor said. Whatever you feel, you should discuss with your doctor right now to clear any concerns you may have.

It is not possible for doctor to guarantee that cancer wil not happen to your child, as the first cancer may come back, or a new cancer can develop. There is just no telling. Now you have to deal with the entire lengthy treatment all over again. If you are not comfortable with the old doctor, you can find a new medical team. Working with a new team might help you get a fresh start and feel better.

Managing your child’s emotion

Your child may have the same feelings that you do. Luckily, children are quicker to adapt than adults and your child may feel better after a couple of months.  Both of you have already gained the experience you need to adapt to the situation, develop a good working relationship with each other and the doctors, and establish a new treatment routine that will work for everyone.  You will, together, learn to live with this new reality, and your support can make a very big difference.

You can ask your child about what they think about the situation. Perhaps your child doesn’t want to tell anyone about the new diagnosis yet, or if they want a different approach to treatment. It’s important to remember that they are the one going through the treatment, so they need to have a voice in how they want to be treated. However, your opinions are important, too, and you need to honestly express your thoughts and feelings.

It is generally good advice to avoid major changes in the immediate future. Give yourself and your child a little time to adjust to this new situation, and then you will be in a better position to know what you need and want to do.