As you may not know, back pain can have a serious impact on your sex life. When you have a fear of triggering more pain, you tend to avoid sexual intercourse and this could affect your relationship. In this article, we would find out how to deal with sexual problems when you have a back pain.

Emotional and psychological issues

Ideally, with those patients who have a back pain, you should bring sexual problems into the open with your partner. This is because a person who doesn’t have a back pain usually find it difficult to understand the feeling of his or her partner. Also, back pain can lead to moodiness and depression, it is hard to perform. So, a good communication is necessary. That your partner doesn’t have the feeling of rejection or resentment when you refuse to have sex.

To ease the pain, you may try these following tips:

  • Be patient with each other.
  • Create a comfortable environment for both of you.
  • Apply a gentle massage, take a hot bath or shower, and use a pain cream to relax the muscles.
  • Use a pain reliever to reduce sex such as NSAIDs. You should ask your doctor for more information.

Sex positions for back pain

You may change your sex positions to have sex better.

Bending backwards/ standing straight is known as “extension”. For those patients who have a disc herniation or a degenerative disc disease, this position helps them feel better and ease the pain. For example, a man with back pain can use the missionary position. That a woman bends her knees toward her chest and the man can support himself on his hands. So, his back is extended more. Also, the woman can face away/ toward him while he lies on his back with a pillow under his back or the man can sit in a sturdy armless chair. In a case that woman has this kind of back pain, she can try a position that lying on her stomach with a pillow under her chest and her man can enter her from behind. Or she can control both her movement and her pain by facing toward/ away from him when he sits in a chair. Or she can use the missionary position and use a rolled up towel or a flat pillow to support her back, but make sure that her legs don’t bend too far.

Bending forwards or flexion position. This position is useful for those patients who have spinal stenosis. For example, a man with back pain who prefers this position can feel comfortable when entering a woman from behind as they both kneel on the bed. Besides, the woman can kneel on the edge of the bed, facing in, while he enters from behind, allowing him to bend forwards as he stands. Or they can try fetal position/ spooning by laying in a side-lying position with him entering from behind. And for a woman who has back pain, she can try the missionary position that keeping her knees bent and pulled towards her armpits.

Ideally, the partner with back pain should take a passive role in sexual intercourse and let the other partner introduce stimulation. Also, in this case, a patient should lie on his or her back with pillows supporting the knees and head, with a small rolled up towel placed under the lower back.

Hello Health Group does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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